When I was a child, the only way I could identify pre-sexual queer characters in fiction—such as in works by Harper Lee, Dorothy Allison, and Carson McCullers—was by their feral nature. I saw myself in these kids’ dirty clothes and boyish swagger, the way they made startling comments that no one else appreciated. I longed for more characters like these, both more children and also adult characters who showed me a future, who did whatever they wanted, who messed up again and again, who did shitty things, who acted in ugly ways, who were fierce and aggressive and sexy and bold and even sometimes mean. I love difficult people, on the page and off, and I get grief for it all the time. But part of why I love fiction is because I can challenge myself to feel sympathy for people who act wildly and badly.
My first novel, Songs of No Provenance, was initially inspired by my fascination with the idea of a protagonist, Joan Vole, an art monster who says difficult things and disappears into her crappy Coney Island apartment for weeks on end on a songwriting tear. Joan doesn’t bother with meals, pees in public, picks up random strangers from bars, and throws her whole body into music. I was curious about what would happen if such a character tipped into toxicity and went too far, harming people and causing real damage. The book opens with a horrible act that Joan commits on stage, which she’s pushed to by her jealousy of her mentee and best friend. Joan must then face the unrolling consequences of her actions, while sifting through her past in a seedy underground music scene for where her life went wrong.
Queerness goes hand in hand with wildness. Growing up queer and trans in a time when it was not okay to be out, I was so outside the norm that I had a certain freedom. I could wear shirts with giant owls on them and have messy hair and ask probing questions and say shocking things, and people would expect it. That’s why I love the 11 novels below, each of which feature protagonists who are allowed to stretch themselves into their wild nature.
A Sharp Endless Need by Marisa Crane
This compelling, propulsive novel tells the story of one of the most feral breeds of queer: the sportsbian. Mack is a high school basketball star who develops feelings for the only other Division 1 hopeful on her team, Liv. Mack and Liv touch all the time on the court and have beautiful communication, moving like one organism, creatures ruled by instinct. But when they are alone, they are awkward and unsure, can only access intimacy by role playing or joking around. The book moves toward breathless sex scenes, where the bodies of the characters take over with a different flavor of wildness. This book is aching and gorgeous, the fast-paced lists and moments of reverie mimicking the energy of the game, and the writing about basketball is full of speed alongside these two young people who have wild hearts and a fierce nature both on the court and off.
To the Moon and Back by Eliana Ramage
The story of a young queer Cherokee girl who is bound and determined to become an astronaut, Steph is one of the most compelling characters in recent memory. She is completely bold and badass, single-minded in her ambition, unafraid to snap back at her mother and betray her sister. She barfs when her mother and sister share a sentimental moment and goes so far as to frame and prominently display the acceptance letter to a school her mother wouldn’t let her attend. The book covers three decades and multiple continents, detailing Steph’s ambition, her romantic relationships and journey of sexuality, and her family dynamics. Steph is so loveable in her wildness that I rooted for her to get whatever she wanted.
The Pervert by Remy Boydell and Michelle Perez
This graphic novel tells the story of a transgirl named Felina who navigates Seattle as a sex worker. Every character in the book is depicted as a human/animal hybrid and everyone acts freely, a little outside the norms of “conventional” humanity. Felina is not afraid to say what she feels like saying, poised to react with violence when she needs to. She has sex with her friends and it doesn’t have to mean anything. She works hard at the factory and cleans deer and wanders where she wants at night. She’s a badass up against a shitty transphobic world. The art is beautiful and expressive and the story is moving and deeply real.
Nevada by Imogen Binnie
A voicey novel about a trans woman who does what everyone has wanted to do at some point: escapes her life. Maria draws in the reader with a conversational, intimate voice that’s absorbing and authentic, like a friend confiding in you on the couch. She sweet talks you through her adventures taking drugs, letting a relationship die, stealing her ex-girlfriend’s car, and making friends with strangers as she dashes across the country. A testament to the freedom that can come beyond romantic love, and because of it, if you just let yourself do what you want.
Open Throat by Henry Hoke
This is the only book on the list where the protagonist is literally feral, because they are a mountain lion. This book follows a queer mountain lion as they struggle to survive in an LA landscape destroyed by humanity, surrounded by drought and wildfires and tepid attempts at talk therapy. Hoke’s lion is loveable even when they are apparently menacing children or considering eating a human. They bring home the very personal consequences of the climate crisis more than any book I’ve ever read.
My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness by Nagata Kabi
This manga memoir tells the story of a twenty-eight-year-old woman who has never had a sexual experience and sleeps with a female escort. When the story opens, Nagata is living a life outside the norm: doesn’t want kids, never washes her clothes, has no friends, no romance, her hair is always messy. She blurts out her feelings to strangers and tears out her hair. In my favorite moment, she eats unboiled cakes of ramen that are so hard they speckle with her blood. Her encounter with the sex worker is utterly honest and moving, and brought to mind for me the experience of squaring your neurodivergence with the way you are “supposed to” act in situations that it seems everyone else can master.
Stag Dance by Torrey Peters
This book is full of a smorgasbord of feral queer protagonists, from a hulking lumberjack boldly exploring gender identity in a hostile clique of other lumberjacks to a boarding school boy driven to commit horrific violence because of his unsorted desire for his ex-roommate. This book is full of wild desire, high-concept trans storytelling, and characters who are unafraid to follow their instincts.
Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One by Kristen Arnett
The protagonist of Arnett’s hilarious and absorbing new book is a MILF-obsessed, financially irresponsible, lesbian clown. The book opens with Cherry jumping out a window after sleeping with a married woman at the woman’s child’s birthday party. Cherry attends punk shows in backroads, DIY queer venues, steals, runs her bank account down to nothing on impulse, and is so guileless and open and full of id that you have to love her.
You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat
This story of a bisexual Palestinian American woman living in Brooklyn and dealing with sex and love addiction bounces between her various relationships and her travels to Kentucky, the Midwest, Jordan, Lebanon, and Palestine as she follows her desires, seeking answers through love, sex, recovery, and writing. The protagonist is not afraid to follow any lead for pleasure, entanglement, or enlightenment that presents itself, and it’s refreshing to watch a character say whatever comes to mind.
Valencia by Michelle Tea
In this auto-fiction novel, Michelle runs wild in the queer subculture of San Francisco, jumping between liaisons with various feral lesbians, a knife-wielder and a boyish runaway, and more, delighting in an urgent realm of imaginative sex. Michelle is a delightful, loveable scamp, free and easy in a city that used to be a queer paradise.
We Play Ourselves by Jen Silverman
This immersive novel is feral in tone as well as in the behavior of the characters. Cass, a young playwright, flees New York after having been cancelled for a strange and brutal act of violence. Cass is a whirlwind spiraling out of one of the more famously staid art forms, and it’s inspiring and thrilling to witness her unbound nature among quiet audiences of old-heads. In Los Angeles Cass ends up meeting a pack of reckless teenage girls who rival her own feral self.
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